The "What If's"

The past couple of days I've had the "what ifs" piled on my mind and my heart which has thus effected my esteem.

What if I hadn't lost the battle w/ food that day? What if that boy and I had gotten together? What if I hadn't moved from MI? What if I'd like the me that stayed in MI better than the me that moved to TN? What if Awaken doesn't get any bigger? What if Awaken isn't about the numbers? What if...what if...what if...

These questions can cripple a person and pulling myself out of the downward spiral my thoughts are taking is a near impossible task. It causes me to sigh "how long Oh Lord, will you forget me forever?"

I know all the right answers about how I'm not forgotten, mercies are new every day, I am called Beloved, No--I wouldn't like the MI me better, Awaken is whatever God wants it to be, for however long He needs it...etc...

Knowing the right answers leads to another "what if" question. What if these answers were more than head knowledge...what if they were really heart knowledge, fully-believed, fully-embraced answers?

What if....

Thursday? Already?

This has been a crazy fast week.
Last weekend I went to Chicago to see Tiffany. We stayed w/ cousin Chris and had a great time! Because it is Tiffany's year with the photo album (we have a photo album that houses' all the pics from our birthday trips) I have limited pics as most of them had to be taken with her camera. But..here is a small recap. (in no particular order)
Enjoy!

downtown chi-town...view from atop the double decker bus
The 2300...where we stayed
Cute Tiffany...atop the double decker bus
waiting to ride the train from the 2300
This is Lake Michigan. I found it INCREDIBLE that you can barely see where the sky stops and the water begins.
This has been a crazy fast week.

10-01-07

You know you've lived a little too long in the south when it's:

a) October 1st and still going to be 85 outside
b) You walk out your front door in short sleeves and say "brrr" because it's actually 60 out.

I don't typically miss the weather in MI...snowy and cold for long periods of time I can typically do without. I do miss it in the fall though! I miss sweater and flip-flops in September and sweatshirts at Friday night football games, the need for hot apple cider, not just the want for it, and the bonfires after the hay ride because its cold and you need to warm up, not just to have there cause you should.

Yes...eventually that will happen here...hopefully before November. Maybe I should spend September and early October in MI every year and then come back down here to finish up and have extra-long autumn. Someday when I'm a writer and don't have to be chained to a desk I will do this.