May 10, 2009

Rare Moments of "Here"

It's not very often I find myself in this place.  
The place of having so many deep, yet-to-be-filled longings and overwhelming peace at the same time.  Usually things are two separate feelings for me.  Usually I move in and out of them depending on the day, hour or minute.  
It's a very deep peace, a deep place. If this moment in my life had a soundtrack, I think it would be some old 1940's jazz or blues singer, with a deep baritone voice singing strong and smooth. I should be sitting in the dark corner of said singer's bar soaking in my surroundings, enjoying the moment.  
I do not know what tomorrow will hold, I'm not even sure I'll live to see it--this is never a given---but for now, this place, this peace, this depth--surrounds me.  Its easy to miss these moments, its easy to want to rush past them to get to the next thing.  It can seem too difficult to enjoy the "here".  The right now, the "in the midst of", or as some have said "to stop and smell the roses"
I have not determined if this is comfortable.  I just know its different. 

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