Ciao!

In 32ish hrs, I'll be heading for the long awaited vacation! Happy 30th/31st to me!
I'll try and write/post pics...but I'm not promising anything.
Italy--Here I come!

Security in Knowing...

I’m typically a feelings girl. My feelings tend to lead me in every day decisions. I feel like coffee instead of a latte. I feel like singing really loud and off key today. I feel the peace of God, or lack thereof.

There are many different levels to feelings. Some feelings are deep and some are shallow. In my relationship with Christ, there are some fundamental truths that you feel on a consistent basis. There are others you do not. In Christianese we call this “head knowledge and heart knowledge.”

Some days you just know, you do not feel and you hold on to the knowing until it becomes feeling again. Shane and Shane have the lyric “I know if You change my mind You will change my heart in time.”

As I sat at my desk today, stuffing envelopes, I became aware that although my feelings have been off lately, there is security in the knowing. He hasn’t changed. He won’t change. My Redeemer is still for me.

My heart will change in time.

It's been a day...

It started well and its ending well, but I have definitely been on a roller coaster today. In the midst of my travels around town, I heard Sara Groves' song"Hello Lord". I have heard it many many times before--but the line

"I don't doubt Your sovereignty I doubt my own ability to listen and to do the right thing and I desperately want to do the right thing..."

I desperately want to do the right thing. For me for now, the right thing is paying attention to me--which I do not do well. Don't get me wrong, I am already hoping that the two weeks in Italy feel like two months. I do not think its a coincidence that I cannot even fathom what will happen upon my return. Most of my 2009 has been anticipating and participating in a major event so after this trip I can't seem to stop asking myself--what's next? Resting? for real? Am I hearing right? And how in the world do I do it??

22 days...

I leave in 22 days! HIP HIP!
The season of rest has come upon me and I am horrible at resting. It's so easy to fill my time with good things, and I pray for discernment between what is best and what is just good. I need to write more this summer. I need to take care of myself and take time for me. I am not good at taking care of me. It is so much easier to take care of others than myself. However, its a catch 22 since taking care of others can only be done well when I am taking care of me. *sigh*
Life's all about balance I suppose.
Here's to learning what that looks like!